Things I’ve Learned From Failure: Part 1 – Depression
One of the hardest topics to discuss is depression. Either the person who suffers from depression doesn’t know how to express their feelings, or the listener doesn’t know how to respond. Depression is a complex emotion that some people just don’t understand. Too often people treat it as something you can just “get over” or “cheer up” as if it were just that simple.
To those people you have to ask, have you ever woke up on the wrong side of the bed. No matter how good of a day you try to have, every little thing makes you a bit more irritable? Same thing happens with depression. It’s not just a feeling that changes with the atmosphere around you. If only it were as simple as a light switch the sufferer could shut off and move on.
That’s the hard part about it. People often have the general misconception about depression. Often people associate it with the sad, lonely, lack of self-worth, but what about the other side? It’s an uncomfortable subject because too often people assume everyone suffering is a suicide risk. Most people aren’t mentally or emotionally equipped to approach the subject head on. Everyone wants to help, but too often fear they’ll give the wrong advice.
But here’s the thing. Not everyone with depression is suicidal or doesn’t know they’re self-worth. Sure, those feelings may come up, but not in every case. Speaking from my experience, depression has come and gone in my life for years. It’s not a feeling of knowing your own value. I know who I am and know full well what I’m capable of and that’s the problem. Knowing your own value sometimes can be your biggest enemy. When you know what you’re capable of, know what you can achieve, and know your worth it can be your own biggest enemy.
Imagine getting to a point in life where you’re pushing to meet your goals. No matter how hard you try, you fail over and over. Now add that feeling of self-worth in there where you know this should be something you are fully capable of, but yet you still fail. Depression is that feeling of being stuck and not knowing what to do next.
When you’ve tried everything and you seem to have hit a wall. Everything you’ve tried seems to blow up in your face to the point you’ve given up trying. That’s depression, and it’s not something you can just “get over”. It’s not something that can always be fixed with a kind word because it’s not always about boosting an ego and pat on the back. The feeling of being out of options, having no concrete plan to get back on track, that’s the foundation that depression is built on and it’s all downhill from there.